ROME — Jewish religious leaders have taken issue with the Apostle Paul’s continuing to preach Jesus as Messiah to Gentile regions, which the Jewish religious leaders have condemned. Things came to head when the controversial figure donned a “Gentile Lives Matter” shirt this week, prompting further outrage.
FT MYERS, FL — In a desperate attempt to get help for its citizens and deal with the growing humanitarian crisis in the area, a Florida town devastated by Hurricane Ian has taken the unusual step of raising the Ukrainian flag, hoping to convince Congress to send aid.
CHICAGO, IL — To help support its recent efforts to conduct grotesque gender experiments on young children, the American Medical Association has appointed famed Nazi doctor Josef Mengele as its new president.
Are you a Dad looking for ways to bond with his son? It’s important to spend quality time with your boys and teach them how to be real men! Otherwise, they may grow up to be whiny weaklings! Not good!
NEW YORK CITY, NY — The NFL has fired its chief neurologist, Peter Pegalia, after learning Pegalia’s concussion protocol was to look for cartoon birds flying around the heads of players suspected of being concussed.
HELL — Board room Demons erupted with thunderous applause and praise for their CEO Satan as he pitched another sinister idea of rebranding the dated term “child sacrifice” with “abortion.”
WEST COVINA, CA — As a special public service for his fellow citizens, a local man has taken it upon himself to crank his car stereo as loud as possible at stoplights so that everyone within a three-mile radius can hear every nuance of his refined musical tastes.
SACRAMENTO, CA — This week, California Pastor John MacArthur wrote an open letter reprimanding California Governor Gavin Newsom after the governor took out billboards across the country promoting abortion services using quotes from Jesus. Sources say the governor is fed up with the constant calls to repentance and that during a wild party at The […]
PALM BEACH, FL — Following the destruction caused by Hurricane Ian, Governor Ron DeSantis has issued a stark warning against all would-be looters hoping to pillage the vulnerable state. This message, however, has not stopped what appears to be a large group of heavily armed looters wearing FBI patches from swooping in and attempting to […]
NASHVILLE, TN — With the success of Matt Walsh and the newly-bearded Ben Shapiro, pressure is mounting at The Daily Wire headquarters for popular conservative commentator Candace Owens to grow a beard of her own.
We are SO thankful that Hollywood has finally stopped their bigotry and made a few movies with LGBTQ+ representation. But the film industry has a long, long way to go if it’s going to undo decades of cis-heteronormativity! Here are several classic moves that DESPERATELY need a reboot with better LGBTQ+ representation!
We have witnessed many beautiful sights in our day, but nothing – not even the births of our own children – can compare to the GOREGOUSNESS that was Lizzo twerking in Abraham Lincoln’s top hat.
HOUSTON, TX — Lakewood Church Pastor Joel Osteen has begun selling his own unique brand of table salt, which is completely devoid of any and all saltiness.
Not all heroes wear capes, but lots of them wear red polos and goofy-looking yellow suspenders. Here we have collected nine legendary tales of when Chick-fil-A employees literally saved a customer’s life in the drive-thru:
A few days ago, President Joe Biden moseyed away from his podium while speaking to a group of FEMA workers. As he did so, worried aides and officials stifled their panic enough to keep their voices steady, trying to beckon him back where he was still needed. At that moment, we saw what we have […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Aides are scrambling to keep the President on track without wandering off stage and getting lost again on national television. To combat this, Biden’s handlers have resorted to laying down a trail of women’s hair on the ground for Biden to sniff and follow.
KYIV — As Ukrainian officials prepared to submit their request to join NATO, President Volodymyr Zelensky planned to use one of the most powerful secret weapons at his disposal — his Hollywood connections — and ask Ben Stiller if he could put the actor down as a reference on the application.
CULVER CITY, CA – After filming only 8 episodes of The Rings of Power, Amazon has exhausted the entire $1 billion budget allotted for the production of the show. Initial reports indicate that most of the money was spent on special effects to make it look like a woman can hold a sword. Powered by […]
SACRAMENTO, CA – In a nationwide campaign to promote abortion tourism in California, Gavin Newsom has purchased ads in red states encouraging women to travel to California to kill their babies. As part of the campaign, he has also taken to transforming into a giant green snake that whispers temptations into the ears of scared […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In preparation for Halloween, White House staffers have spent days adorning the premises with frightening decorations. One prop stands out above the rest: a spooky, lifelike old zombie that wanders the halls, drooling and moaning.
U.S. — A fascinating new study has revealed that the vast majority of people, when presented with a blind taste test, can’t tell the difference between candy corn and a dusty, old orange crayon we found in a junk drawer.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Army’s first transgender officer Major Anna Gabrielian has been charged with conspiring to give secret information to Russia to aid them in their attack on Ukraine. As a result, Biden awarded Gabrielian with the Presidential Medal of Freedom for being the first-ever transgender traitor to America.
