News From David Cole

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  • Ron Unz Can Blow Me

    David Cole - May 14th 2024 2:26pm EDT

    A friend of mine who’s in “the biz” – indeed, a most exceptional writer – considers the opening sentence of a recent email I sent to Ron Unz the best opening of any email he’s ever read: Dear Ron, Hopefully this message finds you well and not overly exhausted by Cockney villagers chasing you with […]

  • Crushing Puppies, Crushing on Nazis!

    David Cole - May 14th 2024 12:00am EDT

    As my regular readers know, I don’t care for Ron Unz. And that’s putting it mildly. I consider him an open sore on the scrotum of the world, a tumor on life’s testicles. He’s the ’net’s No. 1 propagator of Holocaust denial, and he’s proud of it. He’s a professional fabricator, a polluter of historiography. […]

  • “David Cole is Eating His Dracula Cereal”

    David Cole - May 12th 2024 2:38pm EDT

    Okay. what part of “subscribe and you’ll get three things a week” was lost on you? I was clear as a Hawaiian waterfall – subscribe and you’ll get three emails a week: The Week That Perished on Sunday, my reg’lar column on Tuesday, and on Friday, something exclusive. Well, last week when The Week didn’t […]

  • The “Lost” Week That Perished, Plus My New Column and Kristi Noem’s Shot Dog

    David Cole - May 7th 2024 3:52pm EDT

    In theory, it was supposed to go as smooth as the brain of a Nick Fuentes supporter. Three things a week from ol’ Dave: The Week That Perished on Sunday, my regular column on Tuesday, and something new and fun on Friday. That’s what I promised you, my Substack friends. But then this week’s Week […]

  • Confessions of a Cock-Block Columnist

    David Cole - May 7th 2024 7:47am EDT

    It’s been said that if Frank Sinatra was at a restaurant and the scene was dead, he’d tell one of his goons to trip a waiter, just to create some amusement. Well, this election season is dead. With the two main candidates chosen, there ain’t nothin’ goin’ on, and there won’t be until September. Readers […]

  • Where’s the Week?

    David Cole - May 6th 2024 7:08pm EDT

    Yes, for some reason this week’s Week That Perished didn’t run. Look, I’m a coward, okay? What do I harp on if not my unemployability? I have ONE job – Takimag. And I try to keep my head down and not ask questions. Because I’m literally so scared of losing my ONLY POSSIBLE source of […]

  • All Rats Go to Heaven

    David Cole - May 3rd 2024 3:23pm EDT

    With deep regret I must announce that I think Ratibor the Rat has gone to the great garbage dump in the sky. It’s been almost a month since I’ve seen any “proof of life.” I scattered trap-free Cheez Its (his food of choice) in front of the washer and dryer two weeks ago, and he […]

  • This Week’s Column: Nazis, Tuckers, and Dumb Mutherfuckers

    David Cole - Apr 30th 2024 1:18pm EDT

    This is a poll I’ll take to heart. Because I really love you guys. You give me engagement, you buy me beers, and you’ve softened the blow of my Twitter ban (and my YouTube ban, and my Amazon ban). So here’s the poll question: What’s your favorite Dave topic? Because Substack does polls! What do […]

  • Invisible Monsters, Imaginary Heroes

    David Cole - Apr 30th 2024 12:00am EDT

    Did I ever tell you about the time one elderly Nazi took on and beat the entire U.S. government, the neocons, the military-industrial complex, and Israel? It’s a hell of a tale! In 1943, at age 16, German patriot Hans Schmidt joined the Waffen SS as a corporal in Division Leibstandarte. Wounded in battle, he […]

  • The Week That Perished, Sunday – April 28

    David Cole - Apr 28th 2024 11:16am EDT

    The lead story in today’s Week That Perished concerns the tram ride accident at Universal Studios, Hollywood. It’s actually become a controversial topic around here. Universal is accused of downplaying the severity of the injuries, and, indeed, compliant news orgs are no longer mentioning the many injuries (including one critical) that resulted. Universal draws a […]

  • Three Things a Week From Ol’ Dave…How’s That Sound?

    David Cole - Apr 26th 2024 11:07am EDT

    So I’m tryna get into a Substack groove here, and it seems to me that the best pattern I can fall into is to post three times a week: The Week That Perished on Sunday (with added commentary to sweeten the deal for my kind, generous Substack subscribers), my regular column on Tuesday (ditto with […]

  • This Week’s Column: Burning for the FACTS!

    David Cole - Apr 23rd 2024 11:03am EDT

    Hey Folks, Trying to make up for lost Twitter traffic, I’ll be sending out my weekly Takimag column here. If that doesn’t suit you, if you think that’s one email too many from ol’ Dave, go ahead and unsub now, because it’s gonna be a regular deal from now on. To make it less rote, […]

  • The Right’s Burnt Offerings

    David Cole - Apr 23rd 2024 4:34am EDT

    In a column last December, I pointed out that whenever some schizo shoots up a place, and it’s revealed that he left a trail of “red flags” behind, rightists indignantly say, “Hmmph, why wasn’t the FBI on top of that? The crooked politicized FBI is so busy harassing Trump and the J6 peaceful protesters, they […]

  • The Week That Perished, Sunday – April 21

    David Cole - Apr 21st 2024 5:40pm EDT

    This week: – Black astrologer – accent on the “ass” – demonstrates black wreck-cellence – Weight loss drugs be racist…but so be weight – Japan redefines “same day service”…yeah, funeral service – Uber promises to deplatform murderers; crime as we know it ends! – New anti-white book by black woman who’s white Click here: https://www.takimag.com/article/the-week-that-perished-290/

  • Elon’s Coddled, Swaddled Nazis

    David Cole - Apr 16th 2024 12:00am EDT

    To get the formalities out of the way, yes, I was perma-banned from Twitter by the “free speech” Musk regime. And I gotta say, I’d come to really like many of my followers, so please remain in touch on Substack (it’s free, you cheapskates). Why’d I get banned? A tale old as the hills: A […]

  • Dave Open Thread!

    David Cole - Apr 15th 2024 6:19pm EDT

    I’ve been meaning to do another video, and I will, real soon! There’s much to tell. Crippling gout in both feet – the main reason I’ve been so sluggish the past two months. And a giant rat named Ratibor hiding under my washer/dryer. Here he is, scurrying away after briefly getting caught in the no-man’s […]

  • Funny as a Crutch, or a Wheelchair

    David Cole - Apr 9th 2024 12:00am EDT

    Yes, for those who are asking, Elon nuked me from Twitter. Perma-ban—irreversible. Yes, it involved the Holocaust. But let’s talk about that next week, okay? Because a great man died last week, and I’d like to honor him. And recall the time I stalked him. Joe Flaherty was improv comedy. As Dan Aykroyd stated in […]

  • Dining Nazis, Whining Jews

    David Cole - Apr 2nd 2024 2:37am EDT

    I’ve done three straight weeks of politics, so let’s lighten the mood with the Holocaust. Wait, that came out wrong. I mean, let’s lighten the mood with Hollywood. And the Holocaust. Readers have asked for my opinion of The Zone of Interest, this year’s Best Foreign Film (it was also nominated for Best Picture, a […]

  • Tucker the Spear Chucker

    David Cole - Mar 26th 2024 4:04am EDT

    Race sentimentalism is a favorite topic of mine. Having attended majority-black L.A. public schools in the 1980s, and having lived the best years of my life while doing so, I myself am prone to sentimentalism regarding black/white relations, especially after a few drinks (i.e., every waking moment of my day). Whether it’s mainstream conservative sentimentality—“blacks […]

  • How the Hard Right Could Lose an Easy Win

    David Cole - Mar 19th 2024 3:48am EDT

    One more Super Tuesday piece. George Gascon, the Soros-backed mass-murdering district attorney, was up against a slew of candidates looking to take him down. Gascon had to get over 50 percent of the vote to avoid a runoff in our “top two” primary system, and the friend to all rapists and murderers didn’t even come […]

  • Primarily Speaking: Notes From L.A.

    David Cole - Mar 12th 2024 12:00am EDT

    Congratulations, MAGA. You got your Biden/Trump rematch. Just so you know, us opinion journalists were hoping for a long, eventful primary…because we need material. As Eric Swalwell laments to his Chinese concubines, it wasn’t supposed to climax this quick. But climax it has, and only the fanatics are pleased. The “god-king Trump” MAGAs on one […]

  • Immolate to the Party

    David Cole - Mar 5th 2024 12:00am EST

    Last week, murdered college student Laken Riley trended on Twitter, with conservatives pointing out, correctly, that Biden hadn’t said a word about the young life that was violently taken by one of his beloved illegals. Author/strategist Ryan James Girdusky tweeted, “If only people went to the streets to demand change in the name of Laken […]

  • Lyle, Lyle, Crock of Guile

    David Cole - Feb 27th 2024 12:00am EST

    “Amaani Lyle” sounds like a shady dude who lurks in the darkest corners of Times Square selling cheap knockoff suits. “Psst…hey, mister, you wanna designer suit for only $30? Check out my man Lyle! He got so many expensive brands, we call him ‘Amaani Lyle.’” “Shouldn’t that be Armani Lyle?” “Naw, dude, Amaani suits are […]

  • “Experts” Part II: The Dementia Guardrail Paradox

    David Cole - Feb 20th 2024 12:00am EST

    I grew up with a healthy skepticism of doctors. As anyone who knows the Cole origin story is aware, my biological father was the Beverly Hills surgeon/personal physician to the stars who’s accused of killing Elvis by getting him hooked on drugs and feeding his habit. Dr. Cole absolutely was a pusher, and Elvis wasn’t […]

  • “Experts” Part I: Water on the Brain

    David Cole - Feb 13th 2024 12:00am EST

    As I write this, L.A.’s in the middle of a weeklong superstorm of biblical proportions. We’re being pounded harder than Lauren Boebert on a first date. Twelve inches in one night, which breaks L.A.’s record (though not Boebert’s). Remember the merciless September 2022 SoCal heat wave, when every red-state rightist gyuck-gyucker tweeted “L.A. can’t keep […]