NEW YORK, NY — All eyes have turned toward the New York mayoral primaries, as a new poll indicated that a second edition copy of The Communist Manifesto now holds a sizeable lead over other Democratic Party candidates.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Ongoing hostilities in the Middle East raised tensions in the nation’s capital as well, with frustrated legislators who fail to meet their responsibilities on a daily basis reminded everyone that launching military actions was their responsibility.
With the world falling apart and the threat of a nuclear holocaust looming each day, everyone can agree that the greatest threat facing humanity is gas-powered cars. That’s why, as an alternative, people are turning to more carbon-friendly vehicles. But which ones are best?
SALT LAKE CITY — The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has officially launched the first annual BMX Missionary Games, where young missionaries will compete in the arena of BMX sports.
SALT LAKE CITY — The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has officially launched the first annual BMX Missionary Games, where young missionaries will compete in the arena of BMX sports.
U.S. — Theologians have announced a startling discovery that everyone has been wrong about the book of Revelation for thousands of years. While many assumed it was referring to the end times, the tribulation, and the Second Coming, it now appears to have been written entirely about the War of 1812.
U.S. — Theologians have announced a startling discovery that everyone has been wrong about the book of Revelation for thousands of years. While many assumed it was referring to the end times, the tribulation, and the Second Coming, it now appears to have been written entirely about the War of 1812.
U.S. — Theologians have announced a startling discovery that everyone has been wrong about the book of Revelation for thousands of years. While many assumed it was referring to the end times, the tribulation, and the Second Coming, it now appears to have been written entirely about the War of 1812.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Tensions continued to escalate both around the world and domestically, as President Donald Trump announced today that he has evidence that Congressman Thomas Massie was only weeks away from acquiring nuclear weapons.
EDGARTOWN, MA — With the news that the U.S. military had carried out a successful bombing operation in Iran over the weekend, former President Barack Obama was reportedly distraught that President Donald Trump had bombed the cool nuke factory he had paid for.
U.S. — As President Donald Trump announced that the U.S. military had engaged in a bombing attack on Iranian nuclear sites, Americans across the country were surprised to learn that we weren’t already bombing Iran.
Alright, fam. You may have heard in the news that Iran has this nuke factory buried so far underground, only a bunker buster can reach it. There’s this evil that’s way down deep, but no one there has the power to root it out. They need someone else to come along and drop a 30,000-pound […]
We at the Babylon Bee have seen the rage and consternation caused by some of our jokes this week. In order to help everyone take a deep breath and relax, we are simply posting this picture of a bagel that no one could possibly argue about.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In the wake of the Los Angeles Dodgers actively opposing the deportation of illegal immigrants, President Trump announced today that he will begin deporting one illegal for every run the Dodgers score.
GRANDVIEW, MO — A local father who spent the entire day failing to settle a dispute between his toddlers later expressed supreme confidence on social media that he had the entire Israel-Iran conflict solved.
GREEN BAY, WI — In preparation for an early work day, local man David Miles drank a cup of coffee so that, in addition to feeling tired, he could also be irritable.
PRINCETON, NJ — Sources close to Jason Newman reported that the 46-year-old had become increasingly picky over which version of the Bible he would buy and not read.
LOS ANGELES, CA — The Los Angeles Dodgers were hoping to attract large crowds at tonight’s game against the Washington Nationals by offering a limited edition MS-13 bobblehead to commemorate the recent L.A. anti-ICE riots.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats were outraged by an appeals court ruling that permitted the Commander in Chief of the United States Armed Forces to command the armed forces.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats were outraged by an appeals court ruling that permitted the Commander in Chief of the United States Armed Forces to command the armed forces.
TEHRAN — The Islamic Republic of Iran addressed concerns over the recent acquisition of a brand new ballistic missile called the “Jew Smasher 3000” with a spokesman for the regime insisting that the missile is intended to be used for only peaceful purposes.
TEHRAN — The Islamic Republic of Iran addressed concerns over the recent acquisition of a brand new ballistic missile called the “Jew Smasher 3000” with a spokesman for the regime insisting that the missile is intended to be used for only peaceful purposes.
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